Always Want What Haven't Got

YAY!! We had a new subject at this weeks' juggernaut. Her name is Danielle and she works for a company called Wines, LLC. Now I've thought long and hard about names for pets, kids, bands, organizations and whatnot, but the creativity and dynamic brain action that led to the inception of a company so refreshingly named as Wines, LLC is simply stunning! How DID they do it?


Danielle presented a line of wines called BOGO. Now this BOGO is supposed to stand for Buy One Give One, according to the packaging of the wine. The premise is that every time you buy a gift pack of this vino, a portion of the proceeds go toward adult stem cell research.

The first problem I noticed with this whole setup is that traditionally BOGO has stood for Buy One GET One; as in "These Corn King Hot Dogs are BOGO this week at the Piggly Wiggly."
So the entire meaning of this acronym has been usurped and will most certainly be misconstrued.

Secondly, the average chump who wants a bottle of cheap wine most likely couldn't give a crap about adult stem cell research. My presumption here is that it takes at least a small level of erudition to even understand what the hell adult stem cell research is. And if a consumer should have the smarts to comprehend the finer points of adult stem cell research, that same consumer will probably have the smarts to avoid cheap gimmicky co-operatively made homogenous wine.

The crux, for me, is that we have a dude who made up a label...
"Hey, I invented this wine label. Let's call it BOGO!"

Then found some satisfactorily average juice...
"These tanks of whateverthefuck should do quite nicely."

Then had to figure out how to market said product in an artificially altruistic manner...
"Now what cause can we say this wine is for...?"

And since breast cancer was taken and AIDS awareness is SO 1993 and MADD doesn't mix with wine, they latched on to the stem cell research thing...
"Let's copyright those heart thingys on the label. It'll be like the yellow Support Our Troops magnets and soon people everywhere will have BOGO heart magnets on their minivans!!!"

Now cuz this is a terribly sour flame of this whole concept, I will compliment Danielle on her fortitude and unweilding focus on the goal at hand, which was, of course, selling the product. Methinks she has more cajones than me, because I certainly couldn't have squeezed a sale out of these wines.

So thumbs up to Danielle for kickin' it with a bunch of cynical pricks surrounding her and throwin' down her BOGO. I hope she liked us enough to come back again...

Hopefully with better wine...

Domaine Aubert La Chapelle
2004 Coteaux Du Loir

Smokin' cheap Chenin from the Loire. Not that flowery soft Chenin character, but a sharper, more acidic, Sauvignon-like flavor profile.

Chateau de Cary Potet 2003 Aligote

Again, I'm a sucker for clean, vibrant, well-priced Burgundy.
Very chuggable and clean as clean gets.

Verget 2003 Vin de Pays de Vaucluse

This is $8 and tastes like a Burgundy ripoff. Easily the steal of the tasting today!!

Burgans 2004 Albarino

Great Albarino at a bargain price. I'm still convinced, unfortunately, that Albarino producers are beating their collective heads against a brick wall if they're counting on American wine consumers to figure out how good this wine really is.

JL Chave Cotes du Rhone 2003 Mon Coeur

Chef RJ popped this kid just for kicks. Super-lively fruit and fairly big mouthfeel. Worth every penny of its $18 price tag and easy, easy, so so easy to drink. In all honesty, I haven't encountered too many thin or austere '03 Southern Rhone wines yet.

Fritz Windisch 2003 Riesling Classic

Corky came through with a snappy and spicy winner from the Rheinhessen this week. A rarity for Corky, this totally undamaged, un-oxidized, pure, fruity Riesling was quality all the way.

Pepper Bridge 2002 Merlot

I sell this wine, so I'll refraing from gushing unnecessarily.
But the shit is really really good!

Brandborg Umpquaa Valley Pinot Noir

Good varietal flavor and a price hard to believe. Under $30 for this flavor profile is hard to beat. Take your goddamn Sideways back to Santa Barbara (where they'd charge $45 for this caliber of wine).

All in all, a most eventful week of wine and great food. The sashimi tuna and sashimi Kobe beef were both awesome sorry I was too wacked to take pics, and the conversation with Lolo and T-Bud was unforgettable.

Girls, If I thought I could convince you, I'd tell you it's already right in front of you and you already do have it all. Mind control is the key. It's up to you whose mind you control...